Some of you might know that I'm a GQ type of guy. I love fashion , name brands and the sex appeal that some acquires from it. By no means am I conceited. A little vain at times.
When I was in the sixth grade I remember wanting a pair of Nikes. I had asked my mom , I remember very vividly , with urgency if I could have a pair . I had to have them . Instead , she takes me out to K-mart and bought me some "Buddies". Yep ! Buddies. The old slip and slide . As she picked them up from the rack , it was as though someone was dangling a rat in front of my face. I was scared and frighten that the kids would tease and laugh at me. Saying things like ......... I guess you're getting ready for skating season huh or hope some breaks were installed on those shoes. I couldn't wait to start working so I could buy my own clothes.
At the age 16 I started working at the Oakwood Country Club as a caddy. Carrying clubs around 18 holes for those assholes in 90 degree heat for hrs. I would occasionally think about slavery days. Thinking about Kunta Kinta being out in the cotton field. Man ! I couldn't have done it. I would have been one of the first that jumped off the ship before coming to america.
After receiving my first check from the Oakwood planation , I wanted to buy a Members Only jacket. Remember those ? Well, my mom thought I should save my money by going to Value City and purchase their version of the Members Only . Not ! I went right up to Severance mall , there was a store called Man Talk . A store that geared to the cool and sophisticated kind of guy.
So when I arrived at the store , I felt like Popeye , abut to eat his spinach. I looked for the color I wanted , which was black. I then found one that fitted me like a pair a jeans out of the dryer , just right . When I had put it on, you would've thought Superfly son was born. I was cooler than cool. Smoother than smoothe. I was feeling like the Fonz. Okay ! you get the point.
Yesterday evening a friend and myself went downtown to a mexican restaurant called Zacolos. It's on 4th street between Euclid and Prospect.
It's a casual place , decorated in a spanish flavor , not over bearing. Their food is exceptionally good and most of all....... it's the best place on that street to people watch because of it's location. It's placed right in front of the valet sation that is used by all of the restaurants on that street. You get the see all the who's and who's not. From Bentleys and Jags to ........... well you know, those economical cars.
We sat outside , where I usually sit. We had the middle table , right in front of the valet spot. The view was perfect ,the weather was soothing , yes it's summer time again I thought.
The pleasant waitress took our order and the stage was set. One by one, they started to stroll on down. Then comes more and more. Now I'm questioning myself .......something must be going on. Then they started coming in flocks and my eyes were being amused at every level of entertainment. It was my sistas ! (Black American Women) My sistas were throwing down. So they thought ! It was like a parade of the Zulu tribe going to Disney Land. I mean from shape and sizes .To color and length it was all there. There were women dresses shorter than a shrunk up ankle sock that slides down your shoe and can't say on your feet. It was asses so big , was wondering if they would get up from their beds and pull of the sheets off with the cracks of their butts. We saw women with summer long dresses made out of spandex material. Most of them you could tell weren't wearing any undies. All you saw were nothing but jigglin and shakin , which caused major .......you know when someone clothes is stuck in their butts. I can't think of that word , but you know what I'm talking about.
These women were going somewhere. I needed to know.As we glared and stared , I started noticing something else. I notice that most of these women were on the larger scale. Not larger in life ,got it goin on or like that I-N-D-E-P-E-N-D-E-N-T song , but on the weight scale. Now I don't have anything against the BBW (Big Beautiful Women). It just so happen that the majority was what you would call "thick".
Two tables away from us was this couple that were being just as amused as we were. Across the street from them were a restaurant called Flannery's. A irish restaurant that has big bay windows for their patrons too could enjoy the site seeing adventure as well. There sitting in a couple of the bay windows were , I assume the kitchen help , lounging and checking out the parade of Zulus themselves. We noticed that those guys were entertaining the couple , two tables away from us by giving the thumbs up or down for each contestant that were apart of the show.
As the number started to increase , so was my curiosity. I waited to find one of the Zulu members alone , away from the pack . I found one ! She was vulnerable I can tell. Though she weren't as bad as her members , but yet she was still a Zulu.
I asked her if there was something going on. She replied , joe's giving a concert. That explained it. I had heard on the radio about this concert and that some lucky woman would have a chance at getting a date with him. It all came to the understanding. Not the agreement , but understanding. It explain why elephants with the big booties, it explains why the monkeys outfits, it explains the peacocks with the different color hair and it explained why Jane of the jungles had little clothing on.
There was one at the end of te parade that gave the finale. She was about 5'3 weighed around 198. She had coco brown skin. Her dress was long linen with very few etching of red around the neck of the dress. She was wearing these humongus sun glasses that reminded me of the movie "The Fly".
The hair was colored with orange and red. It wa also a quick weave and for those that don't know what a quick weave is ...... it's look like one of those helmets used by the spartans in battle. It looks like it's glued to the head and the hair looks like brissels from the brush you use to clean the snow off your car. The front of this hair piece was drooped over to the side like a vine of grapes hanging from a branch. After seeing that , I thought for sure she was going to break out with a spear and chant ...UGA , UGA ,UGA.
Driving home I knew I was going to blog this and as I was thinking about it all the way home . I came to MY conclusion that I kinda felt sorry for some of them. I felt sorry that some of them have never been expose to anything other than what they see and know. I felt sorry for those , as they walked through this alley as though it was some kind of soul train line. There were discomfort in some of their faces as they strolled down with their heads hanging low , avoiding eye contact. Were they uncomfortable beause they don't know or because we made them feel uncomfortable with our staring as they were some kind of freaks in a circus.
We the American people said tha we need a change. We have program for this and that. Why don't we have program to assist people to find their own identity, motivate and encourage. Teach them the value of integrity , dignity , and a sense of class.
Obama is putting a lot a money into wellness. Lets hope that fashion will too be apart of that change as well.
